Eyy&Est

you don't know how much i long for this, writing something unessential, with stupid words, and no meaning at all. 12.30 pm, now, as known as, 2 hours until my death sentence; hello!

i don't even know what to write, but at least i know why; i've been missing this. like.. yeah. i used to write everything that's on my mind, it's always been like that for the past 3 years. everything was so easy back then, i wrote whenever i wanted to. but now, it's getting more hectic. you see? i'm now a college dude (insert confetti and party sfx) (insert 'boo' sfx)

yes, maybe i should've written this down, like, 2 months ago, when i got my first jamal (a.k.a jaket almamater whatsoever), posting a photo of my KSM (kartu studi mahasiswa) and ranted about college this, college that, engineer soon-to-be blahblah. well i was happy, the first several days was so joyful and full of happiness.

but it's always been like this. Like, always; literally always.

being a freshman always sucks.

and not because i'm a "freshman".

new environment thingies, new culture, new friends. new attitude, hopefully. new personality, maybe. new feelings.

i honestly, don't like everything new. i want my old stuff, my old self, my old town, my old friends. call me childish, i absolutely am. that's why, i always want to just get this over with, like jump through time and voila, sophomore. well i am childish. but it's true; i don't like everything new.

where everyone is so hella busy with their own activities and stuffs. academics or non. being so hella hectic with everything. well i'm the type of person who just doesn't give a shit, so what do you expect? but, like, i'm pressured to do this and that because damn that super-intellect sayings: "if u wanna have many friends, you have to join kepanitiaan and stuff and stuff and stuff" it's true tho; but like what i just said earlier, it's new to me, so.... nah. maybe. but nah. but yea, ok.

where saying sundanese phrases is considered weird. i need to change my way of speaking, apparently?

and new friends. i want my old ones... can i? new friends are ok, but i've always been comfortable with my old ones, so can i?

but all in all, it's great. it's not like i'm frustrated here (yet), it's not like i'm stressed out (a lil bit perhaps), but yea. still, i just want to get this done and over with.